We are back to homeschooling a Preschooler and a High School kid.

Yes! My 2nd boy is out of school, first big question I faced is WHY? Why did we decide to take him out? How are you going to homeschool secondary level? What is going to happen next? 

Well, I thought 2 years of homeschooling a Primary kid in P5 & P6, ended in PSLE. Maybe I thought  since he is a little older, a little more mature to handle whatever stress school, and I am convinced I can never do secondary school stuff anymore, we decided going back to Secondary school was the only option for him. On top of that I was also convinced that those who are homeschooling in Singapore in the High school years are taking foreign curriculum which will end up leading to tertiary education overseas. With 4 kids, that might not be the most affordable option for us. So up till last year this time, homeschooling secondary level is out of the question for us, and so I thought.

My son attended 1 year in a local government secondary school in 2021. I think he got into reasonable good neighbourhood school which I thought was suitable for him. Not too focused on academic, his school teachers were nice and were quite observant of him. First few months he slept early, woke up on his own and took public bus to school. I was happy that he was motivated and happy to go to school. First 2 months was quite fun as they have orientation, fun activities and trying out different CCAs and getting to know new friends. However as the months go by, I can see this excitement dimed. He started waking later and frequently late for school, dragging his heavy 8kg bag to school everyday. He kept repeating that he do not want to go school. But at that point, I told him we do not have a choice he has to try his best to accept and settle into school. 

My 2 homeschooled kids-
Trip to the zoo .
 

Months went by, I see that he is getting more and more exhausted and everyday after school, he will dive directly into his computer games and escape from reality. This behaviour continued and soon, I hear feedback from teachers about him not handling in his work, forgeting to bring things, day dreaming in class. The same feedback I had when he was in Primary school. I also started to notice his unwillingness to go out with us, constainly feeling tired and not wanting to socialise and hang out with family. He rather be in his own virtual world. He also started developing tics, an involuntary movement of the facial muscle that is probably caused by environment stress or triggers. 

Here we go again, looking for help. went to see different Drs, psychologist...etc. One year of schooling has done a lot of damage. ( Yes damage is the suitable term here.)

He cant explain why he feels this way, he just dont like school. But he says most teachers are nice, he has friends, he like the school food and recess is his favourite subject. The worse subject for him is the one with the longest period. I guess for kids, they just say they dont like it. but unable to elaborate or understand why.

I put myself in his shoes, and tried to understand what and why he feels the way he does.

He says he tries to listen to what the teacher is saying, but after a while, he just cant anymore and switches off and do his own thing.

I felt... he must have felt suppressed. He needed to move to learn, he needed to do things to be engaged. He is not a 'sit down listen to lectures' person. And I think sit down, be quiet and listen is not the best way to learn and some people just can not learn this way.

He spends about 8 hours in school, but he is not learnning much. And ends up becoming withdrawn, moody, irritable, depressed, cant sleep well and exhibited signs of anxiety and stress.

I think there is nothing wrong with him, or nothing wrong with school. It just does not suit him. And there is no point for me to fight the school system and trying to medicate him or make him fit into this box that is not meant for him. He is unique the way he is. 

So after researching, planning and talking to many people, we have decided it would be best for him that he learns in an environment that is more customised to his learning needs. Homeschooling beyond primary is actually a viable option in Singapore with options for certification and continued education in local tertiary institution and overseas. 

After fighting a battle for the last one year, trying to find out what is wrong with school, what is wrong with him, dealing with many pyschological and emotional challenges, I found peace that we decided to take this step. I am not sure what the future holds, but I am hopeful it will turn out alright.