Spending one on one time with each child, tough but it's the secret to obedient children!

I have been having some tough time with kids last couple of months getting them to listen to me and getting them to do simple routine everyday task like brush your teeth, eat your breakfast, wash your hands, go and bathe, do your school homework..etc.. No one knew how tough it is to get kids to do these task independently!

A few months back, I came across Amy McCready's positiveparentingsolutions.com, attended their webinar, but I didnt sign up for their online parenting course. ( I think I need it but not so willing to pay for it yet) so I got hold of the book "If I Have to Tell You One More Time..." read it and but didnt put it in practice.

When I hit rock bottom of screaming at kids every single day... risking my baby going deaf... and buying a 'rotan' and keeping behind my bedroom door I realised I need help! I thought to myself, my boys aren't 'bad' kids, it's just that they gets on my nerves when I have to tell them to do simple stuff like a million times a day!

I read the book again and this time I took a note book and wrote down notes. The author uses 'toolbox' to describe the different strategy of tackling parenting challenges.  She says that everyone need to feel a sense of belonging and significance. If they can't get it positively, they will get the attention they need negatively (without realising it). And the first thing that hit me was this: " a rebellious child is a discouraged child " which is so true. A uncooperative/disengaged child is a child who wants to be loved, who is feeling neglected and who feels they don't belong and are not significant in the world. This is true and pretty sad when I think about it.

So.. the first tool that I attempted is 'Mind Body and Soul' which is spending special one to one time with each child, preferably 2 X 10 mins a day. I am starting with once 10mins a day before bedtime or before school.  Well I'm a stay at home mom and I practically spend 24 hours a day 7 days a week with them, but I realised that I am with them physically but my mind is somewhere else. So I've started  since 1st September with what I call it 'Special Time' with each of my boys, almost everyday, and I am happy to say that I'm screaming less!  It's not magic, but I can see that they are more responsive when I call them and more willing to cooperate to get the routine stuff done. Which is such a relieve for a mom!

The goal, like the author said, 'is to forget when was the last time I raised my voice'!

Here's another article that talks about this special one on one time with each child as well. Read it, it's enlightening.
http://www.motherhoodonadime.com/kids/fitting-in-one-on-one-time-with-your-kids/

I'm taking it step by step, hopefully I will read the goal! :)

Update on my craze to teach the boys Chinese :)

I was browsing online and found a facebook-shop selling the set of 四五快读 SiKuKuaiDu books, price is slightly more expensive than what I got. But this site has more pictures to look at. :)
http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.197843283583122.52435.100000723560772&type=3 

This shop also have pretty interesting stuff, saw another 'learn Chinese' set, pretty interesting but more ex & comes with CD and stuff, which I don't think necessary.  But the books introduces words that is straight away put into a passage. Encourage reading with meaning. Interesting. :) http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.116633931704058.11423.100000723560772&type=3

Controlling the shopaholic in me! I'm not buying anymore books to teach Chinese... gonna stick to 四五快读 and the 基初汉字 Basic Chinese 500 (By the way, I just bought the complete set of 25 readers from a Popular Book Fair last week at 30% off :) . 

Opps, I also have a full set of Odanato 红蜻蜓 (which is a compulsory reader from boy's preschool)

If I can follow through with these 3 sets, it's good enough! :)

Back to 四五快读 SiWuKuaiDu, I broke my record of reading 30 pages of parent's guide in very small Chinese wordings in 4 days! I actually waited a few days before I started the boys with the  四五快读 word cards. I was bit uncertain on how to start, don't want to start off on the wrong foot! 

I feel the books 四五快读 acts as a parent guide, which is great as it has helpful suggestions to assist in explaining the meanings of the word. So I just use the flash cards and do 3PL (Montessori style - three period lesson), play games, add in some crafty stuff with the strokes and get them to paste it in a scrap book. And I'm trying to revise each word at least 7 times (over the next few days) so it goes into memory. 

Pasting the strokes of the word
in order : 山 (mountain)

Starting is a challenge, as I was a little anxious about getting them to the activity and Trevor was not as willing to cooperate with me. Well, according to some suggestions that I read from the guide and other parent's who have used the books, key is to set a routine for learning & revising and apparently just before bed time is a good time. It goes straight to the brain for 'storage' in the memory when they sleep.

Acting it out, charades : 人 (man)

I've just started with 4 words, very slow. Even though Tristan know more words, I'm revising those basic words with him so that he has a better understanding them. I find the trick is to start slow, be consistent, and don't do anything too different, transition smoothly. If I speak to them fully in Mandarin, they wont understand and lose interest. So no choice, for a start I'll have to speak English and throw in some Chinese translation. Will slowly transition into speaking more in Mandarin. So far it has improved, boys are more happy to 'learn Chinese'. And they enjoyed the games! Trick is to stop before they get tired of the activity, so they will ask for it the next day :) Hopefully we'll pick up a bit of speed soon. 

Hunting for Chinese program for my boys.

My hunt began when holiday was nearing. I imagined 2 restless boys at home with not much to do and I need some time to complete my reports of my teaching practice, I realised they need to be occupied with something! We live in JB, and in our part of the town, there's not many educational stuff for kids to enrol in. I searched online... nothing. I also drove to a nearby neighbourhood and went from school to school and checked out MRC programs. I specifically wanted Chinese only and maybe for a week or 2. But most of the programs are a month long and I can't ferry them up and down everyday for month, too taxing for me. I was disappointed...

I figured maybe they can do an online program in the comfort of our home. I searched and found these websites, some are free, others offer free trial.
http://www.betterchinese.com/
http://www.chinese4kids.net/online-learning/
http://resources.echineselearning.com/kids/
I haven't really started any of this so I won't be able to review how good it is. You can check it out yourself, if you tried it let me know how it went.

Both my boys have been attending a Chinese tuition class in Tampoi, however the travelling is taking too much time and I think they need a 1-1 or 1-2 ratio to progress faster. Time is running out and Tristan is going to Primary next year. I want him to have a good foundation and feel more confident in speaking, reading and conversing in the language and not fear it. My criteria for the tuition is quite different from the usual type of class. I want them to develop a love for the language and especially being able to converse and express themselves in Chinese. Besides learning to read, write and speak, I dont mind them playing games in Chinese, learn rhymes, songs, maths and science in Chinese too. So I searched for a home tutor, I found one and Tristan just started his first class at home today, we are trying it out and we'll see how it goes. He seems alright with the teacher. :)

While searching online for a Chinese program, I accidentally stumbled upon this link from a mom from Singapore, sharing her experience teaching her kids Chinese. I realised that... tuition once a week is not sufficient as well. Learning language is an everyday thing. There's no other choice but to start teaching them myself. And after reading these mummy's blogs I gain a little confidence that maybe, maybe I can do it.

http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/content/teaching-chinese-home

http://tamarindvillage.blogspot.com/2009/12/teaching-chinese-at-home.html

I got my "四五快读"!!! So happy!

One of the blogger mummy reccomended this set of books call "四五快读" and best way is to order from a China online shop. I tried but, it's all in Chinese and I can't find out how much the shipping cost! So I gave up and tried to see if anyone sells it locally. After much search through friends, book fairs, I found a few online shop that sells it!

I ended up buying from this website, it had the best deal: http://siwukuaidu.blogspot.com/  S$40 for 8 books with Free shipping in Singapore. 

There are few more links that tells more about these books. One of which is that the first book contains a 'must' read 30 pages parents's guide. Especially those parents who wants to use the set of books sucessfully. It looks something like this ( see picture on the right) ! super small Chinese characters! I've never been good in Chinese and now it's very 'rusty'. If I get through these pages, it will be the most Chinese words I have read since I left Secondary school! But good news is that with the help of my dictionary app, and lots of han yu ping ying and english translation all over the pages, I am getting through it, passed the half way mark, yeah!

Here, this mummy further updated on the reviews of the book and introduced another 2 mummies who wrote some review on them as well.
http://tamarindvillage.blogspot.com/2012/04/i-first-introduced-series-of-books-in.html

This site is run by 2 dedicated mothers who are passionate about educating their own children. They wrote a great summary of the first 30 pages of parent's guide. (http://myplayschool.net/四五快读-chinese-word-recognition-program

http://www.parentingjoy.com/tag/siwukuaidu/
http://www.parentingjoy.com/2011/09/review-四五快读-chinese-literacy-programme

I'm excited to start teaching my boys with this book as soon as I finish reading the guide. The challenge is to be consistent and very discipline to teach them every day for 15 mins. Wish me luck! :)

I'm back on Blog!

The passed year has been really hectic with Montessori studies, MummyHugs work, Clover part time work, Kindermusik Classes to teach, Baha'i Children Classes to run, 2 boys to run after, house hunting, renovation, moving house, managing our new home...etc the list goes on! I'm just glad that I survived it all and still remain sane! :)

Beginning of this year, I've just been concentrating and finishing my Diploma studies and studying for Montessori examination. At the same time, I officially homeschool Trevor and another girl from my neighbourhood for a few months. It was delightful and I enjoyed teaching both of them in my Unity House Montessori homeschool, I was going to share my experience setting up my homeschool environment, planning the lessons and even took plenty of pics, I just haven't got down to doing it.  In June, I joined Clover again to do my teaching practice so I can meet the requirements to receive my full international certificate. So here I am, I've finished my hours and completing my report! Finally!

I hope to get a more 'substantial' qualification to become a teacher but I think a International Diploma in Montessori Method of Education is enough for now. I can't do anymore studies with kids and husband... I've neglected them a bit. Oh well, it can wait till later. :)

So, I've a sudden urge to blog about my search for a good Chinese holiday program for my boys. I was quite convinced that I will probably be the last person to teach them to speak and read Chinese. So read on the next blog about my discoveries! :)

Starting Language activities with Trevor :)

Trevor is 2.5 yrs now. I decided that since he is not going to school yet, I better start teaching him at home. So here's us learning phonic sounds at home. I am doing an adapted, integrated Montessori phonics way & got ideas from a website call totallytots. Blogspot.com- great website where a couple of home school mummies share what they do at home. Great great ideas;).

Sensorial Impressions of the shape of the letters before learning to hold a pencil and writing.
Ok so I started Trevor with tracing on 'a' cut out from felt- Montessori way is to use sensorial impression for the 2-3 yr olds. Actual Montessori material would be the sandpaper letters buy I just adapted a little. Still using the same concept I used other materials instead. Haven't got time to get the sandpapers and cut them into letters of the alphabets yet. So here is our little creation;)




double click to see it in another window or tab.

Ants on the apple 'a','a','a'!- we did a letter craft with felt and cut a real apple and did printings with it.Result- an apple tree."

Big Brush Painting:
Started a scrap book on phonic sounds " We did big brush writing where i printed a big 'a' using wordart in words font size about size250. This is a pre-writing exercise where Trevor used different crayons and colour pencil and paint brush to trace and practice writing the formation of the letter 'a'. I must say he is pretty good at it. Didn't need much of my help at all. The sensorial impression did work;)

Pegging:
After painting it, I get Trevor to run outside and peg the paper on the line(practical life integrated- pegging uses 1st 3 fingers of the hand- the pincer grip which is essential for preparation for writing.

Writing on our sand pit.
Then we traced 'a' in our little sand pit. Where I bought some fine sand from a nursery and put it in a container. I showed Trevor how to write the letters on the sand with his hands and I got Trevor to 'erase' it with his favourite digger and he writes again.

Intergrate Cultural: Science & Mathematics
After that we took out and dried the apple seeds from the apple that we uses for printing and did counting with them.

We ended the activity with some apples for snack. ;)


We did the same for the other phonic sounds:
For 'b' we did a craft tracing the bowl and using different balls to print and make patterns.
"Using crayons- "balls are bouncing b b b""

Currently we are on schedule- one phonic sound a week. And another we do is mystery bag. I collected items whig begins with the sound for example, for 'b' we have ball, barrel, boat, bear, banana, bell, bag...

Mystery Bag
"Learning vocabulary of sounds beginning with b"
I place all the items into a drawstring bag and we take turns putting our hands in to feel and touh an object saying "I spy with my little eye, a ...." we try to guess it before pulling it out. ( integrating sensorial exercise- stereonogstic bag) Language is all about talking, communicating and relating to the environment and the experiences of a child. After pulling the object we talk about it , where have we seen this before, what does it do, sing songs relates to it. We then place the items from left to right-encouraging left to right concept, preparing the eyes for reading left to right and the hands to write from left to right.

Sound like a lot?I try to keep it simple and it's just a half hour daily activity and we repeat the
mystery bag exercise and tracing the letter as revision for the other days of the week. moat importantly is we have fun learning;)

Check out the photographs that I have taken and if you are a parent try it yourself. Learning should not only be in school by it should begin at home as early as possible :) Have fun!

Practical Life Activities at home.

I just wrote a blog in Picasa but the page was expired and there goes my LOOONGG blog... Never write a blog in Picasa!

Anyway here's the blog again. :)

Threading Beads

Threading is one of the Pratical Life exercises of Montessori.
In Montessori, there's a reason and purpose behind every exercises.
For example: Why use a table mat to place the material?
Ans: To protect the material, to protect the table, to mark a work area, care of environment - care and respect another child's work space, rolling and unrolling a mat exercises fine motor skills and we are instilling a sense of order in the child.

Why threading?

Aims of threading: Eye-hand coordination, development of fine motor skills,preparing the child for future art and craft, learning patience, independence and concentration.
Age: Suitable for about 3 yrs onwards. (For younger children, get bigger beads with bigger holes and the bigger string)

First we introduce the material to the child. This is a mat, a basket, some beads with holes and a string.

Place the string horizontally and show the child how to thread the beads. Movement should be clear and easy for child to follow step by step.

Remove one bead at a time and place the other hand on the rest of the beads to isolate them.

In my course we have to demonstrate the whole process then let the child have his turn. But in reality that's probably not going to happen. So we can ask the child to wait and you show a few first and let him or her continue.

Cross Stitch

Why Cross Stitch?

Aims: Further refining fine motor skills, eye hand coordination, lengthening attention span, concentration, indirectly preparing child for mathematics (patterns) and preparing for future art and craft.
Age: The lecturer mentioned that it was suitable for 4 yrs old onwards, I was like- 'are you sure? you mean my 4.5 yr old can do it? I did cross stitch when I was 10!'

 I had to make one sample for my file (my homework). I went over to Tristan and asked him if he would like to learn how to do it? Then, he was playing with his Lego, and his reply was 'no thankyou'. Fine, I went thinking it's probably too difficult for him anyway.

After a few minutes he finished with his toys and came look for me. Saw me still with that piece of cloth and the needle. He asked me what I was doing. I told him cross stitch. I asked him if he like to try, he said '...ok.' I showed him how to make X on the cloth and how to go in and out of the tiny holes in between the squares. Then he did it. He made about 7-8 'X' and ran away to continue playing with other toys. SOooooooo.. it's true, a 4 yr old can do it if he was shown how and given the chance to do it. This is what we made together. nice? :)

Matching & Threading smaller beads
 
This is not exactly montessori, this is an idea that came up while clearing my storeroom. I found a lot of paper bags that I collected over the years and decided it was time to clear them. Seeing the strings still in tact, I remove them and recycle the rest.
 

I then realised that the string came in pairs and they were mostly different coloured. I could do a matching colour activity with Trevor.

And so I did, I ask him to lay the strings out neatly row by row. I chose a Black string and put it on top, I then ask him to find the other Black string and place it together with the first one. He enjoyed laying out the strings neatly and he repeated the colours after me. The colours were not exactly all correct but it was ok for a first try. :)

I then realised that there are knots on the strings and hey... I could do some threading.
I found a box of beads from my school days. and ask Tristan to sort them out according to they size and type. Then ask him to thread them. He did a pattern of Big bead and Small bead. There you go: he's ready for mathematics! AND they are kept occupied for some time!:)

My 2 boys occupied and I had a peaceful few minutes... :)

Will try to update more soon. :)

Is TV good for your child?

Thought I would have some time to blog during the Chinese new year break but 9 days of eating, visiting and hot weather have left me and the boys with flu and sore throats. We need another week to recuperate!

Kids with flu and no where to go, we need to keep them pretty occupied if not it's a disaster! Tristan is always bored and looking for things to do. Now that he can operate all the tv, cable tv, computers & laptop around the house, he cant help but watch tv and play computer games all day! After much reminder, I've decided to confiscate and hide the tv and Astro remote control. A bit of TV a day is fine, I love some of the quality program. Cailou, Sid the science kid, Curious George are good quality programs. Most are from  pbskids.org. Which Tristan has already mastered how to go to the website's game corner and he plays most of the games there without assistance. Well I let him play about half hour a day. If he plays more than that he cant play any the next day. So far his computer discipline is quite ok, but not TV!

Me and Yyn's kids stonning in front of TV! :)

I know too much TV is no good, but why no good I'm never quite sure. I always tell Tristan it's bad for his eyes and his brain gets too tired...etc. I search online and got this.

How TV affects your child?
http://kidshealth.org/parent/positive/family/tv_affects_child.html
Here's an excerpt 

"The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that kids under 2 years old not watch any TV and that those older than 2 watch no more than 1 to 2 hours a day of quality programming.

The first 2 years of life are considered a critical time for brain development. TV and other electronic media can get in the way of exploring, playing, and interacting with parents and others, which encourages learning and healthy physical and social development.

As kids get older, too much screen time can interfere with activities such as being physically active, reading,doing homework, playing with friends, and spending time with family."

Wow, it's actually more bad than good! And they actually reccomend NO TV for kids under 2!

Here's another Article on TV from Raise Smart Kids
 The Good and Bad Effects of TV on Your Kid
http://www.raisesmartkid.com/all-ages/1-articles/13-the-good-and-bad-effects-of-tv-on-your-kid

Interesting read... So what shall we do with 2 very bored kids at home?